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You Already Have the Love that You Seek
To be free all you have to do is make yourself wholly available to what is already inside you. — Dr. Robert Holden
When I was younger, I always had the idea that love was a gift that someone would give to me one day. But I questioned if I would ever get it because I didn’t think I was particularly special.
Fast forward several years and several relationships later, I was loved and yet it didn’t transform me in the way I hoped. If I wasn’t addicted to the love in the relationship, I was underwhelmed by it.
I then had to pivot from thinking that I may not ever get it, to thinking that I need the “right person” to get love from. As a result, I dated people I normally wouldn’t and quickly remembered why I didn’t date certain types. They made me feel unsafe but I needed to risk it all for love — or something.
It occurred to me that maybe I was the problem. After all, I am the common denominator in all my failed romances. But I didn’t know what the specific problem was, much less how to solve it.
Eventually, I started to question love itself; not whether or not it existed, but why I had it in friendships but not romance. Actually, the question of if love existed was always laughable because obviously people had it. Some enjoy successful, long-term romantic relationships so clearly…