What Happens When Two Codependents Get in a Relationship?

Jason Henry
4 min readMay 19, 2020
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

Based on the nature of a codependent being a people pleaser, someone who will sacrifice their wellbeing in order to preserve a relationship and bases their self-esteem on the opinions of others, I believed that a codependent could only end up with a narcissist.

A narcissist in this context is someone who places their wants above the other person and ignores the opinions of others, especially if negative. It’s important to note that this person does not necessarily have narcissistic personality disorder.

The main similarity between the codependent and the narcissist is that they both want the relationship because they both lack self-love. The difference is that the codependent will sacrifice themselves to get love, while the narcissist will sacrifice the codependent to get love.

The two go together in a grand ol’ dance of dysfunction. You simply cannot have one without the other.

I spoke to a friend of mine the other day. She’s a salt of the earth type of girl who got badly burnt by a narcissist in her previous relationship.

She told me that she’s about to embark on another relationship and that this new girl is just like her in that she is always the person who cares more and gives more in a relationship.

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Jason Henry

Former Edu. Psychologist | Current Writer | Constant Learner | “By your stumbling the world is perfected.”