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The Green Flags of a Relationship
This is long overdue because sometimes the best thing you can do is to look for the things we want instead of trying to remember and looking for the things that we don’t.
And if we have that list of things that lead us to our realized goal (in this case, a positive relationship) then we can stop the potential of catastrophizing (and ramping up our anxiety) and simply focus on capitalizing on what makes sense and what works in a relationship.
1. Setting and honoring boundaries
When we experience life, we learn what feels good and what doesn’t. We learn what we like and what we don’t like. We learn what we want and what we don’t. These experiences tell us what our boundaries are.
So, for example, if you tell someone you don’t like to be tickled, and they don’t do it, that’s them respecting your boundary. If they were to cross it, it is an indicator that they don’t mind making you uncomfortable to make themselves feel good.
And that’s kind of insulting, to be honest.
If they say they don’t have boundaries, that’s a lie. That’s akin to saying that they don’t mind being catapulted into a beehive at 93 mph wearing a shirt that says wasps > bees. That’s an unpleasant experience for virtually everyone.