Life Isn’t About Getting What You Want

There’s a certain short-sightedness when it comes to goal attainment. Once we see a way we think our desires can be fulfilled, we begin to assume that that is the way our desires will be fulfilled.

That is, until it fails. Then we start to say, oh no that wasn’t the way. This new way is the way. Until that doesn’t work either. Then we continue this dance for a little while until eventually, we realise that just because we think we’ve made it, doesn’t mean we actually have. What you’ve made it to is the next step.

Moreover, we develop an appreciation for our failures. Without them, we wouldn’t have the information necessary to actually make wiser decisions. We look back at how we were and shake our heads with a smile because we can see just how myopic we were. If we’re really smart, we’ll keep our eyes peeled for more lessons to come.

You see, it isn’t that you can’t get what you want. It’s just that if that was really what life was about, goal attainment would be much easier. And boring.

It’s like playing a game and every single shot you took went in. That’s not entertaining at all. We might hate to admit it, but we actually, sort of, dare I say, like to fail. We like when life pushes us back, which causes us go even harder, smarter or faster.

When you beat a game on easy, you move on to the harder levels because you want a challenge. The game is fun and while you might be afraid to lose, the fact is, you’re more afraid of the boredom of playing on easy mode every time. Life is no different, and you might hate that that’s the case but it is.

Adulthood takes on more responsibilities with less energy and more obstacles. If you were to take a step back into Kindergarten you’d be happy for a while but eventually you’d be bored out of your skull.

Now, I’m not saying that life is all about obstacles and suffering. But they are a part of life just as success and peace are. In a relative world, you have to have both sides of the coin for there to be a coin at all. I’ve never seen a coin with just one side and no one ever will.

One huge takeaway I want you to consider is that our desperation for things to go our way could only come from the thought that our success is in doubt. That for some reason, life isn’t supporting our desires. You are life itself but you think that you oppose yourself.

You think that you have an agenda that is separate from life, but how could that be? Aren’t you a member of life? What other entity could inspire you to desire what you desire? Life has your back because life gave you your desire and your obstacles to help you grow; life has given you all the tools. But do you recognize them as such, or do you worry that because you didn’t get what you wanted that life hates you?

I don’t think life hates itself. I can’t fathom why it would be invested in its own ultimate downfall. But I can see that it is invested in its success, even if that means that for now, you fail, learn, improve and then when you get success you can actually maintain it.

Former Edu. Psychologist | Current Writer | Constant Learner | “By your stumbling the world is perfected.”

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