Is Love Really an Action?

Jason Henry
4 min readOct 8, 2020
Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

When you look up “love” in a dictionary, you will first see the definition of the noun form and then the definition of the verb form.

Love as a noun means deep affection while love as a verb means to feel and/or to give deep affection.

So, I guess that’s that. Love is an action after all, right?

Yes, it definitely is. But I would be remiss not to mention an issue that has become more glaring the more I pay attention to its existence.

Abusers are well aware that love is an action and they will use that to get into the lives of those who just want happy, healthy love.

When we talk about love being an action, we do so because we used to largely associate love with the feelings and emotion of love — the noun form of love.

But then we wised up. We realized that just because someone has deep feelings for us doesn’t mean much if they don’t back it up with the requisite actions.

In order to feel loved, we needed to see it demonstrated. Words are cheap but actions speak a thousand words.

In realizing this, a lot of us were able to walk away from people who probably cared but either not enough to show it or had their own demons battling inside, possibly stemming from an insecure attachment style.

Whatever the reason, we leveled up and we knew what we deserved: love demonstrated.

This is good but unfortunately it isn’t enough.

The truth of the matter is that there are people who are more than willing to do all the loving things you’ve been dreaming of but they are still toxic.

Think of narcissists and love addicts who love-bomb you with words, actions and gifts. Whatever your love language is, they already know it and are giving you exactly what you’ve always wanted.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is a trick.

If someone you barely know is showering you with affection, run. They are going to exploit you.

The only time this behavior is appropriate is when parents are snuggling up to their newborn baby. And even then many parents are very careful on how they care for the child.

Jason Henry

Former Edu. Psychologist | Current Writer | Constant Learner | “By your stumbling the world is perfected.”