It’s always good to be thankful for the people in your life and to celebrate their impact in your life as they celebrate your impact in theirs. It’s a beautiful thing.
I believe I’ve shared it in writing but I’ll say it now: relationships are probably the most important things for a human being. We aren’t like other animals who don’t need to pair-bond, we definitely need it. Animals don’t have attachment styles problems like humans do.
Some of us may typify the lone wolf trope but even the wolf eventually returns to the pack. Humans have to return to…
I’ll admit, spirituality has helped me in very important ways. I differentiate spirituality from psychology as psychology being the study of behavior and spirituality being the study of the self.
The problem is that when you are emotionally stunted, psychologically clueless and spiritually shackled, you are a sitting duck. You think that in finding spirituality that you’ve found something to solve your problems. What you don’t know is that the same coping mechanisms that protected you as a child are now screwing you over as an adult.
Spiritual teacher Teal Swan shared this incisive insight:
“In spiritual communities, the ego…
One of my ex-girlfriends got married recently. Naturally, this caused the people closest to us both to wonder if I was okay. I totally understand why they’d ask. After all, I thought it’d be me she would marry.
But once the breakup happened, then some years passed and then she started a long-term relationship. She seemed to be in a good place while I was still navigating some tricky subconscious waters.
However, everyone’s concerns got me thinking. What would’ve happened if I fought for the relationship? …
It’s interesting when you see people swear to you that they want a relationship but when they are in the process of getting one or they’ve actually received the relationship, they are stressed out, annoyed, anxious or fearful.
And this isn’t just a one-time thing. From relationship to relationship, the emotions are consistent. Things may start out good or there may be good times during the relationship, but the stress eventually pops up and takes over.
Let me be clear. Nothing in life is consistently positive or free of problems. But there is something to be said about a specific…
It’s quite interesting to hear the advice others have for you. They seem so certain about what they’re saying that it’s almost offensive. How can they be so sure they know a better way when they’ve never spend one day in your shoes?
But here’s the uncomfortable irony: you’ve probably done the same.
Haven’t you heard the problem a friend, family member or colleague is going through, then readily came to a solution? The reason for that is two-fold, with one solution being pretty simple but the other one a bit more complicated.
The first reason is that they aren’t…
Here’s a painfully obvious statement about relationships: you either need to be with someone who knows how to be a good partner or is willing to become one.
Here’s an equally obvious statement that is maybe even more painful: you need to be someone who knows how to be a good partner or you need to become one.
They say opposites attract, so it could be that someone who knows what they’re doing in a relationship and is willing to add to their expertise could attract someone who is pretty ignorant on the theory and the practical.
We see this…
[You can watch my video on this post here.]
At around 4 a.m. one restless morning in the west side of Manhattan, singer/songwriter Matt Scannell was struck with inspiration. But he just rolled over in bed, hoping that he would remember the lyrics playing out in his head when he woke up.
Inspiration struck Scannell again with the intro of the song, but again he didn’t move out of bed.
Fortunately for Scannell and for anyone who is a big fan of this song, inspiration was relentless. It was when he heard the entire chorus that he knew he had…
Don’t even think about it. You know exactly what the “it” is. It’s the first thing that popped into your mind as you read the headline. It’s may even be one of the first things you think about as you wake up or the one of the last things you ponder before bed. But it’s certainly a recurring question in your life.
Am I doing it wrong? Am I thinking about this the right way? Do I have all the information to make this decision? Is my perception off? Are they right about me? Can I carry this weight? …
I was talking to an ex some time ago and expressed how important boundaries were in a relationship. I even admitted that I didn’t enforce my own when we were together but now they’re firmly in place.
She didn’t like that. To her the word “boundaries” meant that she couldn’t do certain things (to which I interpreted to mean that she couldn’t get away with certain things) and that there are consequences to actions. And she’s right!
Unfortunately, she could not understand that she also has boundaries, which if crossed, would cause her to walk away from a relationship.
Anxiety has become a trigger word in the last decade because of the heightened attention to psychological disorders and also because the world has become more uncertain for more people in recent years.
But while anxiety has always had a negative connotation because it is an uncomfortable phenomenon, we have seemed to forget the function behind it and therefore its utility in our lives.
The Oxford Pocket English Dictionary defines anxiety/anxious as “mentally troubled, worry or concern, eagerness, and troubled desire or uneasily wanting.” …
Former Edu. Psychologist | Current Writer | Constant Learner | “By your stumbling the world is perfected.”