Member-only story

5 Strange Lessons I Learnt from Dating and Attraction

Don’t solely focus on what’s bad

Jason Henry
7 min readDec 18, 2020
Photo by JD Mason on Unsplash

1. Attraction may never, ever die

Two people could be separated for a decade or more and the attraction doesn’t wane. It explains why people try to get back with their ex. It explains why despite learning the lesson that your ex was supposed to teach you, you go back for a refresher course.

It’s not that you didn’t learn the lesson. It’s just that this person scratches a psychological itch or they’re your body type. We may think that the incompatibility would push us away from our former flames, but those differences were about the relationship. That doesn’t stop attraction one bit.

It’s at this point where you may fall back into old habits, talk of a relationship comes up and then someone has to de-escalate expectations and remind the other of why things failed in the first place.

Perhaps the saddest reality of life is that you can truly love someone but not be able to be with them. Incompatibility will keep the bird and the fish forever admiring one another but prevent them from fully immersing themselves into each other’s world.

Your friends and family may love you and your ex together, but the mechanics of the relationship prevent anything other…

--

--

Jason Henry
Jason Henry

Written by Jason Henry

Counselling Psychologist | Current Writer | Constant Learner | “By your stumbling the world is perfected.”

Responses (1)